Which mask am I wearing today?

April 26, 2007 at 8:02 am (brain, colleagues and friends, ego, private personal space)

So I got my MTBI test results. Interesting stuff but mostly things I knew. Like the fact that I’m a bit of a procrastinator or as they call it, “pressure-prompted”; not very social; prefer concepts instead of concrete little details…you know, all the obvious stuff . What I didn’t see coming was the fact that I can appear cold to those who don’t know me. Geez, really? And here I thought I was a likeable person… 

But it got me thinking: how do we know we’re presenting the selves we want others to see? Yes, we all wear masks and change them according to where we are and who we’re with, but generally, we want people to see us in a certain way, right? 

So what else do I think I’m showing to the world that is seen in a completely different way to that which I intended? If I didn’t know that I can appear cold/unemotional/tough to those who don’t know me really well, what else is there about me that I don’t get (and that hasn’t been answered in this test)?

I mean, do I truly come across as the person I am? Personal experience says not always, except to the people who bother to get to know me (according to the test, I’m also very private and it’s hard to share my emotions. Ahem,  shock, um, horror).

I chatted to a colleague about this thing of how we see ourselves and what others see us to be and she mentioned a few examples of people who have no idea others are terrified of them/think they’re funny/think they’re weak/think they’re dramatic, etc. Funnily, to me, there wasn’t a question that that’s exactly how the people she mentioned comes across. But she insists they have no idea of that facet of their personalities which makes me think I am missing out a lot on the person that is myself.

But now what does that mean? I suppose I should ask people what they really think of me and how they perceive me. Might not like all of what they have to say but probably insightful to hear it anyway.
And it would be a good thing to talk to others and practice chit-chat because, apparently, I hate small talk and will only participate in deep, meaningful conversations…now why would they think that?


  1. cara said,

    it’s really interesting when you get into what people think of you. i recently asked a whole bunch of my guy friends what they thought of me when they first met me, and they said ‘intimidating.’ i don’t know though, whether that’s me being intimidating, or them finding a women who has her own opinions intimidating.

  2. MrsM said,

    I can’t ask what people think of me. ‘What if they’re right?
    And yes Cara…I got “intimidating” a whole lot. Geez…I used to think I was incredibly shy.

  3. tbhanks said,

    I’m seeing a pattern here girls. We’ve all been told we’re intimidating even though we don’t think so. We’re all smart, confident, etc. So therefore, people must be intimidated by all the things with which we’re blessed.

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